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Writing in Microsoft Word an Excercise in
Frustration
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I've been writing a book over the summer, which is why you haven't
heard my "unreasoning shrill anti-PC ranting at a low, low discount
price" voice as much as usual.
And, of course, to get the job done the publisher requires the use
of Word. I can't use one of the substitutes such as AbiWord or
OpenOffice, because there are a lot of graphics to be inserted that
don't translate well.
What I found out is that there's a reason they don't translate
well. Word, as some of you have already pointed out, is not Word
compatible.
Word is, as many of you know, a word processor, not a page layout
program. It tries hard to be a page layout program, but it really
isn't built for it. I'm using Word for X, but I can tell you from
many years of experience that even though Word 5.1 was no great
shakes either, at least you could control it to some degree. Word 6
was a disaster, and Word 2001 was painfully slow but usable.
Now we're at Word 2004, which I haven't seen yet. I doubt that the
things that trouble me the most have been fixed; perhaps one of you
fine readers can render an opinion.
When you insert a graphic into a Word document, it can be treated
in one of two ways: It can be an inline graphic, which is like a
single giant letter of the alphabet and subject to rules like if you
backspace over it it will disappear, or you can place it as a
wraparound graphic.
Here's where the layout fun begins. When you place a picture in
Word in wraparound mode, it becomes anchored to a particular
paragraph nearby. Selecting the graphic requires sub-pixel cursor
control, so set your mouse to superfine and have a spare desk
nearby to use as a mousepad. The placement of the picture is
relative to the first letter of the paragraph, so if you edit text
later and move the anchor paragraph, your picture may stay in the
same relative position or shoot off the edge of the page because the
beginning of the paragraph shifted as it dropped down below newly
added text, or disappear completely for several days until it pops up
later at the beginning of your last section break when you were
editing something four pages after that
Always anchor graphics to paragraphs that are not flowing around
the graphic, and the problem mostly goes away.
Along the way I learned other tricks of working with Word.
If your program crashes unexpectedly, there is still hope. Before
you start working make sure you set autobackup and
autorecovery in the general preferences. I had autorecovery set up
(Word: Preferences: Save bullet: check "Save AutoRecover info every
10 minutes") set up, and I thought this would protect me from the
regular crash-and-disappear problems I have when doing some intricate
graphics inside a text box maneuvers.
AutoRecover is supposed to load a cached backup copy when you
restart Word. However, earlier this week it didn't work. I dug
through help files and Web support pages for a while until I located
the location of autorecovered files (user: Documents: Microsoft User
Data: AutoRecovery save of ....) The last one listed was from weeks
ago, so I looked a little more and found a series of documents all
titled "Word Work File A_gobbledygook" that I had assumed were temp
files containing clipboards or subsets of the document.
Lucky for me, the most recent Word work file was the entire
document just before the latest crash, so I could pick up where I
left off.
All of this could have been avoided if I had just checked "Always
create backup copy" in the preferences dialog, which puts a duplicate
right there in the directory where my file is supposed to be every
time I save.
I also have autosave activated, but that didn't help me in this
case because the crash occurred during a save; the program
stopped responding and sat spinning for half an hour before I gave
up. When I tried to open it again, the document was corrupted and
caused Word (and AbiWord, and OpenOffice, and AppleWorks with
MacLinkPlus translation) to crash when the document opened.
Of course, it must have been my fault for, uh, hmm, saving too
often, yeah, that must be it. If you save too often, Word will crash.
Whoda thunk it.
I'm getting through this book, and there are some nice features
I've taken advantage of in Word, but I have to say the style dialog
is a complete mystery to me. It's out of control and doing bizarre
things like suddenly switching in the middle of the paragraph -
probably some hidden key combination is triggering it due to my
sloppy typing. I like having text boxes inserted for parenthetical
comments - I just love em-dash asides, can't you tell? - but with
all the other features running around you'd think they'd let you have
boxes with rounded corners.
I can't use macros for repetitive tasks because they're verboten
by the publisher (can't say as I blame them), and every time I blink
the program starts repaginating, which takes 3-4 seconds while you
wait (at least for a 350 page book). There's bound to be a switch for
that somewhere in the preferences. Or in the menu items that are
turned off by default. Or in the list of functions you can make a
button activate.
The trouble is, by the time I've learned everything I need, the
latest version of Word will be all rearranged like the aisles of my
local Costco in a desperate attempt to make the consumer feel a new
product has been released.
Tell me, does anybody use all this stuff? I'm writing a book, for
cryin' out loud, and I don't use a tenth of it. What is a
cross-reference and should I be using it? How do I insert an index
entry without all those funny characters that get tacked on screwing
up my pagination in page layout mode? Shouldn't those be invisible?
Why does a document need a background sound?
Anyway, those are some of my thoughts regarding Word. Many of us
are required to use it from time to time for various purposes, and we
just have to muddle through. I'm sure you know what I mean.
Somewhere around here I've got an old set of 5.1 disks. I wonder
if it'll run in Panther via Classic?
Jeff Adkins is a science teacher who isn't afraid to state his preferences in computing platforms. In his classroom he has everything from a beige All-in-One to a a G4 XServe, and they all work together nicely. He calls himself the "poster child for technology integration" in the classroom. He was the 2006 Outstanding Educator of the Year for the California Computer Using Educators (CUE) organization. He also maintains a site for astronomy teachers at www.AstronomyTeacher.com.
Mac of the Day: 'Sawtooth' Power Mac G4, Aug. 1999 - Available in speeds from 350-500 MHz, 'Sawtooth' introduced AGP video to the Mac.
Group of the Day: G4 List is for those using Power Mac G4s or G4 upgrades.
November 21 in LEM history: 00: OS upgrades, downgrades - AltiVec vs. Pentium III - 01: Saved by the clones - Computer of the future - 02: Apple Education: Let's get to it - 03: Panther lets Macs and PCs work together, - Lombard SCSI bug - 05: 3 survivors from the 1970s - Real world battery life inadequate - Windows to Mac file transfer with Zip disks - $99 alternative to Microsoft Office - 06: Parallels 1.0 far more polished than beta
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